Better To Be Correct

Express how you truly feel with no concerns about being "politically correct."

The Beauty of Being Multilingual: The Double Standard Story

with 9 comments

One of the greatest things with being multilingual is that you have that many more ways to express yourself.

But, the fun comes in when you’re surrounded by people who don’t know you know their language.

I was taking my last final yesterday, when two guys were talking about stuff I’m sure they wouldn’t want me or anyone else to know. They were sitting one row ahead of me speaking at the top of their lungs, so it’s not my fault for hearing their conversation. They were saying explicit stuff about girls, in which case I’d usually laugh at them for being a “typical guy,” but this time, the things that were being said really angered me.

For starters, roughly translated, the guy on the left was talking about a girl who “is a giver” and had slept with her boyfriend, and he’s even slept with her at one time. The guy on the right then asked him to “hook it up” so that he can get some too. Now, if they were to be talking about the mere act of sex, I wouldn’t care as much. What they were actually talking about was saying that because the girl was not a virgin (and had slept with her boyfriend of all people), then she’s an automatic whore. Well, I don’t understand why it’s okay for HIM to sleep with a girl and be perfectly fine with it, while SHE on the other hand gets the dirty labeling.

I mean, even with the example they brought up, the girl was with HER BOYFRIEND… not sleeping around with several guys at a time, so that makes their labeling that much more stupider and infuriating. But say she was to sleep with a guy who **drum rolls** was not her boyfriend, as long as it’s a mutual thing between the guy and the girl, why would it be anyone else’s problem? Especially since the guy made it okay for him to sleep around and not care about the girl. I can’t stand this whole double standard most guys put on girls.

Seriously, get over yourselves, and join the twenty-first century.

How do you feel about guys labeling girls as whores just because they’re not virgins?

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Written by Annie

March 21, 2009 at 4:44 pm

9 Responses

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  1. Even as a guy I can say that is ridiculously stupid on their behalf.

    Anonymous

    March 21, 2009 at 5:58 pm

  2. Are you serious? Wow, those guys need a reality check.

    Anonymous

    March 21, 2009 at 6:01 pm

  3. Stop eavesdropping on people’s conversations and then complaining about it, whore.

    Anonymous

    March 21, 2009 at 8:20 pm

  4. Yeah. Slightly stupid. (Or would that be stupider?)

    I may not agree with the way in which they were talking about it publicly, and I agree that there’s a double-standard. But there’s another side of the conversation that’s been omitted.

    Part of it has to do with how the individual in question feels in response to the label. Typically, girls are quite offended when labels regarding promiscuity are applied to them. Guys on the other hand most likely don’t take offense to it, and in fact some (immature) guys wear it as a badge of honor. So does this mean it should be okay for girls to apply the label to guys, but guys can’t apply it to girls? If your argument hinges on the equitable awarding of labels, I’d say that they need to be equally given and received as well.

    Again, I don’t agree w/ the guys discussing it publicly, and I also don’t agree that a single partner warrants a label, esp. if that partner is in a relationship w/ individual in question.

    Your argument though seemed to try to make the issue more general, and I’d attack the generalization on the inequalities on the reception of that label by both genders.

    And I’m not going to sign this just to frustrate you ;-P

    Anonymous

    March 21, 2009 at 8:24 pm

  5. Not that it’s fair, but society does have a double standard about this. Just because a woman’s not a virgin, that definitely does not make her a whore, but a woman who sleeps around does lose more respect (in general society) when compared to a man who does exactly the same thing.

    In any case, I would think twice before I got involved with someone who cant count their total past sexual partners on their hands and feet

    Teja Vepa

    March 21, 2009 at 8:44 pm

  6. The stud/slut double standard is complete bullshit and I completely agree with all of your statements in response to that conversation. The meanings of the words “slut”, “whore”, etc. are entirely socially constructed and the entire situation is a product of a patriarchal society bent on repressing and controlling female sexuality.

    Whitney

    March 21, 2009 at 9:29 pm

  7. Thank you for the comments. Now for more specific responses:

    ~Anonymous #3: I almost feel sorry for you… and sad part is I think I may know who you are. It’s not my fault they were speaking really loud not knowing I speak their language. And just to clarify, I speak four languages, and am working on others.

    ~Anonymous #4: Whitney’s response pretty much sums up what I would say. The reason why I take all double standard issues very personally is because my father has been applying it to me with regards to EVERYTHING since day one. Yes, most immature guys do take such labels upon themselves with pride, but calling a girl a whore has a completely different connotation than calling a guy a whore. Therefore, when people apply those labels to guys, it’s irrelevant because it doesn’t mean the same thing. I’d actually love it if the same labels with the same connotations were put on guys, in which case I then wouldn’t have the need to post this blog. So, in that sense, you’re right.

    P.S. There’s no reason why not signing your name would frustrate me =) I respect people’s privacy and intimate thoughts that they would share here which they otherwise wouldn’t share, hence why I’ve enabled the option of “anonymous” while responding.

    ~Teja: That is perfectly fine, but like I said, these guys were judging her on the mere fact that she “wasn’t a virgin” (and was sleeping with someone she was obviously in a committed relationship with), when on the other hand they were going around sleeping with countless girls without a care. And not that it matters, but they weren’t even good looking.

    ~Whitney: Exactly!

    Annie

    March 21, 2009 at 10:42 pm

  8. What I don’t understand why you would accept the double standards and then bitch about them later? your running around in circles….

    Anonymous

    April 4, 2009 at 6:24 pm

  9. Where do you see me accept the double standards?? Please show me….

    Annie

    April 4, 2009 at 6:59 pm


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